I not only like broccoli, I like broccoli rabe. It’s good not being a supertaster!
I have no tastebuds, so anything is great as long as it’s drenched in hot sauce.
Could that be why you don’t have any taste buds, Sabs?
I love raw broccoli stems in particular.
You want to say Hi to the cute girl on the subway. How will she react? Fortunately, I can tell you with some certainty, because she’s already sending messages to you. Looking out the window, reading a book, working on a computer, arms folded across chest, body away from you = do not disturb. So, y’know, don’t disturb her. Really. Even to say that you like her hair, shoes, or book. A compliment is not always a reason for women to smile and say thank you. You are a threat, remember? You are Schrödinger’s Rapist. Don’t assume that whatever you have to say will win her over with charm or flattery. Believe what she’s signaling, and back off.
If you speak, and she responds in a monosyllabic way without looking at you, she’s saying, “I don’t want to be rude, but please leave me alone.” You don’t know why. It could be “Please leave me alone because I am trying to memorize Beowulf.” It could be “Please leave me alone because you are a scary, scary man with breath like a water buffalo.” It could be “Please leave me alone because I am planning my assassination of a major geopolitical figure and I will have to kill you if you are able to recognize me and blow my cover.”
On the other hand, if she is turned towards you, making eye contact, and she responds in a friendly and talkative manner when you speak to her, you are getting a green light. You can continue the conversation until you start getting signals to back off.
The fourth point: If you fail to respect what women say, you label yourself a problem.
There’s a man with whom I went out on a single date—afternoon coffee, for one hour by the clock—on July 25th. In the two days after the date, he sent me about fifteen e-mails, scolding me for non-responsiveness. I e-mailed him back, saying, “Look, this is a disproportionate response to a single date. You are making me uncomfortable. Do not contact me again.” It is now October 7th. Does he still e-mail?
Yeah. He does. About every two weeks.
This man scores higher on the threat level scale than Man with the Cockroach Tattoos. (Who, after all, is guilty of nothing more than terrifying bad taste.) You see, Mr. E-mail has made it clear that he ignores what I say when he wants something from me. Now, I don’t know if he is an actual rapist, and I sincerely hope he’s not. But he is certainly Schrödinger’s Rapist, and this particular Schrödinger’s Rapist has a probability ratio greater than one in sixty. Because a man who ignores a woman’s NO in a non-sexual setting is more likely to ignore NO in a sexual setting, as well.
So if you speak to a woman who is otherwise occupied, you’re sending a subtle message. It is that your desire to interact trumps her right to be left alone. If you pursue a conversation when she’s tried to cut it off, you send a message. It is that your desire to speak trumps her right to be left alone. And each of those messages indicates that you believe your desires are a legitimate reason to override her rights.
For women, who are watching you very closely to determine how much of a threat you are, this is an important piece of data.
an excerpt from Phaedra Starling’s “Schrödinger’s Rapist: or a guy’s guide to approaching strange women without being maced” (via lostgrrrls)
HOLY FUCK THE TRUTH.
Can every one of my male followers read this? And please, before you get defensive (“I would never rape anyone!”) keep in mind, women being afraid of Shrodinger’s Rapists (oh my god i still can’t get over the encompassing brilliance of this phrase) is a conditioned, learned response from being immersed in rape culture and the evolution of sexism and sexual violence in our society from the day we’re born. And unfortunately, it’s very difficult to unlearn without the efforts of all genders to dismantle it. Which is where you come in.
It’s also just rude and disrespectful to patently ignore what someone has told you regarding their personal space, body, and time. Get a clue.
I will always reblog this. Always.
So if you speak to a woman who is otherwise occupied, you’re sending a subtle message. It is that your desire to interact trumps her right to be left alone.
Hell yes to all of this.
wildcardgal reblogged your post and added:What is Churrasco?
Brazilian barbecue, basically. About fifteen different kinds of meat grilled on a spit, that they bring to you sizzling on the spit. They slice pieces off for you, and they keep bringing it until you tell them to stop. Plus sides like salad and rice and beans, and nummy tiny cheese breads.
My friend and I traditionally go for her birthday, and then for mine.
That sounds really good. Happy birthday to you and yoir fri3md, whenever that day may be.
Anonymous asked: I really think you're taking the casting of the Maximoff twins way too personally. I'm sure Joss Whedon wasn't out to offend you when he made his decision. He wanted two young fresh up and coming actors who already had Hollywood acclaim and that is understandable.
hey pal, fuck you.
joss whedon probably wasn’t out to offend me personally, no, but guess what butterplum, he did anyway.
because i grew up in a neighbourhood where the other parents told their children they weren’t allowed to play with me because i was dirty and untrustworthy and a thief.
because i had ethnic slurs hurled at me from my fellow students and other residents throughout the majority of my life. because the german word for gypsy was spraypainted onto our house wall 8 times throughout the years we lived there and, on one memorable occasion, keyed into my mum’s car.
because my mum’s mother died in a russian concentration camp and no one would help her father raise his five daughters alone because everyone viewed him as waste, expendable.
because my mother eventually had to fend for herself on the streets as an orphan when she was only 13 years old because she had literally no other choice. because she was mistreated in the orphanage she eventually went to, and because she was thrown out of three schools for “misconduct” that was really just profiling based on the fact that she had roma heritage.
because even though she managed to leave that part of her life mostly behind and found a family and get a job, her sisters weren’t so lucky. one of them permanently ended up in a mental institution after being denied healthcare by the country she lived in due to her heritage and her psychosis grew unchecked until it evolved into fullblown schizophrenia. one of them killed herself. she hasn’t heard from the other two in years and isn’t even sure if they’re alive anymore.
because 90% of roma people live in poverty. because 45% of those fall under extreme poverty with living conditions without water and electricity and basic things like food. (x)
so yes, i take it personally. because it is fucking personal.
the maximoffs were literally the only representation of romani people i’ve encountered so far that weren’t either a stereotype or a criminal. the fact that they were allowed to be heroes and stand for positive ideals despite their background was revolutional for me when i first learned about them, because my entire life i’ve been made to feel that being roma is bad and disgusting.
it’s bad enough that wanda maximoff was already turned into an ableist joke and fridged twice in the comics.
and joss whedon looked at their background history and how hugely important it is for minorities and deemed it not important enough to be included.
that’s especially horrible considering the fact that not only are roma people treated like scum everywhere, anti-semitism is still very much a constant threat to jewish people everywhere and anti-semitic hate crimes are on a rise.
the fact that joss whedon didn’t even waste one thought on the repercussions of his decision when he retconned the maximoff twins to be british is frankly disgusting and speaks volumes about the kind of person he is.
and if you look at his decision and find absolutely nothing wrong with it, then it speaks volumes about the kind of person you are, too.
To the poster above me: I wish I could make this better and different and other-than-it-is for you.